The following is a review of my ebook Private Conversations by erotica author Sylvia Storm on her website E-Read Erotica Reviews. My deepest appreciation to Sylvia for taking the time to give this book her honest assessment.
Private Conversation is the shortest ebook among my selection of titles, and also my most lighthearted title. Like all of my Spinning Heads titles, this was written years ago, long before I ever seriously considered writing in any professional manner. While they were all ‘cleaned up’ quite a bit before publishing, I tried to keep as much of the original “feel” of the stories as I could, so I am aware that they are a little ‘rough around the edges’ style-wise. I was slightly surprised, however, that a piece that is not even 4,000 words in length was described as “wordy” at times. LOL
I am glad that the humorous aspects of the story worked as well as they did, however. 🙂 And thank you, Sylvie, for not spoiling the ending. LOL
It was a typical, boring, run-of-the-mill evening with nothing on TV….
It was also a dark and stormy night, and I am amazed at this line’s staying power as a story starter. Yes, this is a pet peeve of mine, and I feel we need to kick things off with a great first-line. Today we have Private Conversations (Spinning Heads) with a fun little short by Forrest Young. This is more your swinger style book with a fun little story about a wife swap. I have to admit there is some humor here, and the whole situation is played for laughs. It does feel like a skit from the late-night comedy show, although this skit is a little more explicit, well, a lot more explicit.
Yes, this is one of those rare books where I am rating on humor as well. The humor in this book is done pretty well, it is mostly of the “what in the world is going on?” style of humor. It is kind of like a wife swap where only the wives know what’s going on, so there is that madcap zaniness going on here that I like. Nice job. Someday I would love to read a book full of erotic skits, sort of like a SNL style show but a bit raunchier and funny.
The cover, I don’t know, I feel their expressions make this a little unappealing to me. Not a bad composition though. I mean, as a comedy book this may work. They just have this silly look on their face, sort of a come hither…I know what it is, this is a book about a twosome and they are both looking at me. Threesome? Yeah there is an implied third person here that throws me a little. Also, the lighting on them doesn’t match. She is left lit, and he is right lit. The fonts and text work are good, and they do imply the humorous content, and even the title does, so points there. Maybe it is because I just can’t stand both of them staring at me, sometimes a cover strikes me odd like that.
Text quality is average, dialog is good. Okay, I probably need to explain, so time for an excerpt:
“Cindy had to go somewhere for a little while,” Lori told me. “She asked me to come up here and keep you company until she got back.”
“Where did she have to go?” I asked, totally confused by the entire situation.
“I’m… not sure,” she said hesitantly as she walked toward the side of the bed I was laying on. “She just had to go somewhere real quick and asked me to come up here and keep you company. Is that alright?”
We do get Lori’s description later; I did want to right off to set up the scene. We have a couple extra little phrases in here that are just very telly for me. We get the repetitious dialogue tags like “told me” and “asked” that repeat what was just said in a tag. Second thing, “totally confused by the entire situation” is very telling and does not feel needed. And finally, the adverb “hesitantly” and the walk towards the side of the bed of course he was laying on. Established facts need not be reestablished. It’s not bad dialogue, though, it has that good ‘sound’, but I feel the pieces around it distract and weaken the overall effect.
Heat level is pretty good, mixed with the comedy it works like the late-night comedy sketch this feels like. There is a great mix of him being stunned and panicked at the situation, with the other woman being in control. It is a fun ‘my husband will so be pissed at you’ sort of sketch. It is a great scene, funny, with some great nasty phone sex style talk going on. There is also very funny twist ending here I shall not spoil. I did enjoy the ending.
Soft recommend for this, it is a witty little piece with heat. I like sex and comedy works, they are fresh, funny, and they put a little twist on normal life. I have a couple issues with some of the extraneous tags and explanation here; humor is very unforgiving when it comes to pacing. Comedians know they have to be spot on with their humor, and not put anything extra in there to confuse the audience or lose the pace of the joke. I’ve been told humor is one of the hardest things to get right, and humorous erotica is doubly so. It isn’t bad though, and as a humorous piece I got a kick out of it. Thank you for the smile Forrest, and I’m looking forward to your future works.